Category: Funny SMS

Unlike others your brain is a master piece,
It is divided in 2 parts – Left & Right.
In left nothing is Right & in right nothing is Left!

Before Marriage:
Roses Are Red,
Sky Is Blue,
Oh My Darling
I Love You.
After Marriage:
Roses Are Dead,
I have Flu,
You Are My Headache
I Will Kill You…

Said to a railroad engineer:
What’s the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late.
The reply from the railroad engineer:
How would we know they were late, if we didn’t have a schedule?

Lawyer: “What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?”
Witness: “He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’”
Lawyer: “And why did that upset you?”
Witness: “My name is Susan.”

John: What food u feed ur new born baby?
Beautiful Young Mom: Breast milk & orange juice.
John: Oh my… Which side is orange juice?

Lawyer: “And what did he do then?”
Witness: “He came home, and next morning he was dead.”
Lawyer: “So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?”

Itâ?Ts the thing that satisfies
Ur mind, body & soul!
Do it on bed, on a sofa,
In the car or anywhere!
Itâ?Ts called prayer!
God bless ur naughty mind.

Son: Dad 5+5, how much?
Dad: You fool, You don’t know this, go and get a calculator.

When WORDS fail, eyes speak.
When eyes fail,”HEART” speaks.
When HEART fails, nothing speaks they put cotton in the nose…

Choosing career is like chosing wife from 10 girlfriends,
Even if u pick most beautiful, most intelligent, kindest woman,
There’s still pain of loosing 9

Mon to Sun, From Jan To Dec, From birth till my death,
my feelings 4 u have never changed.
For me, you’ve always been a headache!

Wives r incoming calls,
Lovers r outgoing calls,
Aunties r Toll-free calls,
Call girls r Roaming calls,
Neighbour girls r Missed Calls.

Sales man : Sir, which shaving cream do u use ?
Customer : Kumar’s.
S.M : Which after shave do y use ?
C : Kumar’s.
S.M : Which tooth paste do u use ?
C : Kumar’s ?
S.M : Which shampoo do u use ?
C : Kumar’s.
S.M : Sir , what is this kumar’s is it an international company ?
C : No, he is my room mate.